Always the Bridesmaid and never the Bride…..

Married life now begins at 40 with one in ten Australians waiting until their forties to tie the knot. Quite often age and assets go hand in hand. If you are marrying or moving in with someone you may want to think about protecting your current or future assets with a binding family law agreement also known as a pre-nuptial or cohabitation agreement.

What is a cohabitation agreement?

A cohabitation agreement is a binding legal agreement which is used by couples who are planning to live together (a de facto relationship). It explains how your assets, financial resources and any liabilities are to be divided should your relationship come to an end.

What is a pre-nuptial agreement?

As the name suggests it is a binding legal agreement used by couples who plan on marrying one another. Like a cohabitation agreement it explains how your assets, financial resources and liabilities are to be divided should your marriage come to an end. 

Pre-nuptial or cohabitation agreements are often negotiated by way of collaborative practice – where you and your partner and your family lawyers sit around the table to discuss what is important to each of you and both of you together.

At Bayside Collaborative we can guide you in sensitively discussing issues with your partner, either yourself or by us communicating with them directly or with their lawyer.  

For more information about the Collaborative process please contact us or visit our website at www.baysidecollaborative.com.au 

Divided Loyalties – it doesn’t have to be that way

Divorce isn’t easy on anyone in the family, and grandparents are no exception. The hurt feelings, sadness and anger that erupt at the time of a separation can threaten and potentially destroy even the most loving of family relationships. For grandparents, focus usually turns to protecting their own son or daughter regardless of whose decision it was to separate. After all blood is thicker than water – isn’t it?

It is crucial for grandparents to try and take a neutral stance in front of their grandchildren. The most important rule to remember is to never speak ill of their former daughter or son in law in front of their grandchildren – never. The family dynamics are changing with one parent perhaps moving out of the family home or the home being sold with children potentially having to move school and friendship circles. Their safety net isn’t as tight as it once was and grandchildren need the stability, reassurance and support from grandparents during this difficult time whilst their parents navigate their separation.

Grandparents often become a grandchild’s confidant during a separation as children feel they perhaps can’t open up to mum or dad or burden them at this time. Whatever a grandparents thoughts are as to the separation one must put their own personal feelings aside and put on their happy face when with their grandchildren. If children hear another family member speaking ill of their mother or father they tend to take it personally and want to defend their mother or father. It puts the grandchild in a difficult position, of choosing sides and of being involved in non-age appropriate conversations. Taking sides or speaking ill of another may result in catastrophic events for grandparents as their grandchildren or former daughter or son in law may prevent all communication and not wish to spend any time with the grandparents. 

As a grandparent you may have been close to your daughter or son in law and in turn their parents and feel a sense of loss by the sudden changing dynamics. Those relationships can continue to prosper albeit there needs to be a mutual desire to do so. 

The most important thing to remember is that children of separated parents whose parents treat each other with kindness and respect are the children who do the best in the long term and the same applies to grandparents.

At bayside collaborative we can assist your child to resolve their separation issues constructively ensuring a positive outcome for your grandchildren.

Constructive Negotiation

How it works

Constructive negotiation enables you and your partner to negotiate with each other through your lawyers.

You each brief your lawyers about your expectations and the lawyers negotiate to reach agreement through correspondence or round table meetings or a combination of both.

With constructive negotiation lawyers play a more active role in the negotiation process.

The method of communication – correspondence, telephone attendances, meetings – can vary but the objective is still to reach a negotiated separation agreement.

This process doesn’t require clients to be together in the same room.

For more information about the Collaborative process please contact us or visit our website at www.baysidecollaborative.com.au

Two birthdays – wouldn’t that be nice

Previously having two birthdays a year was reserved for the likes of the Monarchy. Just imagine, two parties, two birthday cakes and if you are lucky two sets of presents. 

Queen Elizabeth celebrates her official birthday this year on the 12^th June being the 2^nd Monday of the month and a public holiday. It’s an opportunity to have a long weekend spending time with family.

Nowadays having two birthdays is becoming a popular occurrence given the increasing number of separated families with each parent wanting to enjoy and make the most of theirs and their child’s special day. Celebrating twice is not only reserved for birthdays but also other special family occasions such as Christmas, mother’s day, father’s day and Easter.

Often negotiating arrangements for children to spend time with both parents can become problematic and lead to upset, anger and frustration. What is of primary importance though is for children, regardless of their parents differences to still spend time with both of their parents at special times however that can be facilitated.

Choosing to adopt a collaborative approach to discuss arrangements for your children following a separation will prevent such difficult and upsetting conversations and help you focus on what is important for your children. 

Visit our website for more information www.baysidecollaborative.com.au